Sports Gambling Puns

1. Sports Gambling Puns Jokes
2. Sports Gambling Public Companies
3. Sports Gambling Puns Images
4. Sports Gambling Pros

While sports betting may be on the sideline for now, online casino games have risen to the occasion and the number of people playing around the world has skyrocketed. This is because more people have been in their homes, looking for a break from Netflix, something to entertain themselves, and who want to try their luck at making a little side. A collection of gambling jokes and gambling puns. Enjoy these hilarious and funny gambling jokes. We've collected the best of gambling jokes and puns just for you. Note: In case it’s not obvious by now, this article is about American football puns. If you’re more interested in what most of the world calls football (aka soccer), reading these puns probably isn’t your goal. Gameday Captions and Messages. Here are some football-related puns you can send from the game, or while watching the game on TV. This compilation contains some of the best quotes we could find related to gambling, luck and money. Since humans have existed they have gambled away their fortunes, and it is probably the fate of man to continue gambling so long as there is anything left to bet on. What a coincidence I was planning on writing a sports betting jokes post anyway. 😀 I reckon we all know that sports have probably been a popular pass time for centuries. That being the case we can probably also say that punters have been betting on sports for centuries.

Funny or bad christmas jokes are a key moment of the festive season. Here are a bunch of the best jokes to keep you merry this christmas!

1. What happens to elves when they behave naughty? Santa gives them the sack.
2. What kind of music do elves listen to? Wrap.
3. What is a snowmans favorite breakfast? Ice Crispies.
4. Why didn't the skeleton go to the Christmas party? He had no-body to go with.
5. Who hides in the bakery at Christmas? A Mince Spy!
6. What says 'Oh Oh Oh'? Santa walking backwards!
7. What do you call a greedy elf? Elfish.
8. What do zombies eat with their Christmas dinner? Grave-y.
9. Who delivers presents to baby sharks at Christmas? Santa Jaws!
10. What did one snowman say to the other snowman? Can you smell carrot?
11. Whats the best Christmas Present? A broken drum - you can't beat it.
12. Which of Santa's reindeer has bad manners? Rude-alph!
13. Why did Santa put a clock in his sleigh? He wanted to see time fly!
14. What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney? Claustrophobia!
15. Why does Santa have three gardens? So he can ho, ho, ho.
16. What do you get if you combine Santa and a duck? A Christmas Quacker!
17. What do snowmen eat for lunch? Iceburgers!
18. Why are Christmas trees so bad at sewing? They always drop their needles!
19. What happened to the thief who stole a Christmas Advent Calendar? He got 25 days!
20. What is a skunks favorite Christmas song? Jingle smells!
21. What is Santa's dogs name? Santa Paws!
22. What falls at the North Pole but never gets hurt? Snow.
23. What never eats at Christmas dinner? The turkey – it’s stuffed.
24. Where does Santa stay when he is on holiday? At a Ho-ho-ho-tel.
25. What do you call Frosty the Snowman in May? A puddle!
26. Did you know that Rudolph the Reindeer never went to school? He was elf taught.
27. What did Adam say the day before Christmas? It's Christmas, Eve!
28. What do snowmen usually wear on their heads? Ice caps!
29. Where do you find chilli beans? At the north pole!
30. What is a librarians favorite Christmas song? Silent Night
31. What do you call a frozen elf hanging from the ceiling? An elfcicle!
32. What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride? Holly Davidson.
33. Why does Santa go down the chimney on Christmas Eve? Because it 'soots' him!
34. How do you know Santa is good at karate? He has a black belt!
35. What do you call an old snowman? Water.
36. What do Santa's little helpers learn at school? The elf-abet.
37. How much did Santa pay for his sleigh? Nothing - it was on the house!
38. What does Santa say at the start of a race? Ready, set, Ho! Ho! Ho!
39. Where do snowmen keep money? In a snow bank.
40. What type of cars do elves drive? Toy-otas.
41. Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman? Because he is so cool!
42. What do you call a cat on Christmas Eve? Sandy Claws.
43. Knock knock.
    Who's there?
    Mary.
    Mary who?
    Merry Christmas.
44. Knock knock.
    Who's there?
    Snow.
    Snow who?
    Snow use - I've forgotten my name!
45. Knock knock.
    Who's there?
    Hannah.
    Hannah who?
    Hannah partridge in a pear tree!

The topics for this week’s puns and one liners is gambling jokes. I should add that I’m not much of a gambler; the biggest wagers I seem to make are playing 2p machines at seaside resorts, so I am far from an expert in the topic. As normal, these come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…

I make a bet with a local farmer each year as to which lamb will jump highest. I like a gambol.

Got asked to leave the casino the other night. They said I had a chip on my shoulder.

How do you become a millionaire through gambling? Start as a billionaire.

I’m going to an Abba themed poker night. The winner takes it all.

Sports Gambling Puns Jokes

Lost money betting with with one of the big cats at the zoo. Think he was a cheetah.

Did well at strip poker the other night. I played my socks off.

Sports Gambling Public Companies

I gambled on a giraffe race the other day. Mine came second. Lost by a neck. It was nowhere near.

I took a gamble and bought a small boat without seeing it first. It was a punt.

I used to love eating chips until I got barred from the casino.

I bet on a horse at 10-1. It didn’t come in until half past three.

Walking down the road earlier and I tripped over a sign from the local betting shop. What are the odds on that?

A friend of mine keeps insisting on skipping through flower meadows. I think he has a gamboling problem.

Why are large maps rubbish at playing poker? They always fold.

Last week’s snooker jokes are here.

Sports Gambling Puns Images

If you like these gambling jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.

Sports Gambling Pros

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